Monkey Foot Mandarin

You guys are the best. Thank you for all your kind words and support. I took a sleeping pill last night and finally got a good night's sleep so today I'm so much better. And I just got an email from my SW that she has to reschedule to Sunday morning due to a death in the family. Yay! Not for the death, but for the 2 extra days we get to prepare. We've been painting and with the yard sale our house basically exploded. Now for some fun stuff:
~Remember I told you a couple weeks back I hit the wrong button and now Jon's atm card will only talk to him in Chinese? Well I called the bank and they sent a new card and said the new card would default to English. It didn't. So I called the bank again the other day and told a new person the situation. She said there was nothing they could do from their end. What do you mean? You're Bank of Metropolis- the most powerful bank in all the land. She said the language option can only be changed at the atm. I said ok but the problem is the atm will only talk to us in CHINESE and we don't read or speak Chinese. She suggested maybe we take a Chinese friend with us to the atm. Oh, Jimshum- er, Jason, I know I called you by the wrong name for over a year but could you please help us with our atm troubles? How do you say fubar in Chinese?
~Speaking of Jimshum, we went in to pick up Chinese for dinner the other night and I'd been listening to my Learn to Speak Chinese audio book on Hale's iPod so I was all prepared with a new phrase. I walked in and said hi to Amy, Jimshum's wife, and told her I had a new phrase for her. So I said "Ecuse me, I can speak a little Mandarin." in Chinese. She looked at me and said "Listen to you! You said 'Mandarin!'" I said I said about 8 other words too. But apparently I don't have the tones down so the only thing she understood was the word for Mandarin. I probably walked in and said "Chicken toaster singing monkey foot Mandarin." Dammit! I was already on unit 2 and now it seems I failed unit 1. Back to the first lesson of Mandarin for me!